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These lines to make you smile (according to the subject heading) arrived via email. I'm putting up half of them this week. So then I can enjoy the rest of my temporary brain death for another week. Feel free to react :)

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.

2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

10. Out of my mind.. Back in five minutes.

11. Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

12. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

For more Thursday Thirteen or to join, visit Megan and Janet.

Comments

Shelley Munro said…
LOL - most of these made me smile.
Danielle said…
Great List! Thanks for a morning laugh!
I am Harriet said…
EXCELLENT!!! excellent!!! Excellent!

Enjoy your Thursday!
http://harrietandfriends.com/2010/08/wanna-get-your-car-stolen-get-an-escalade/
Pamela said…
Great list - I'm smiling!
Jennie said…
Ha! Love #2. I think I've found my new motto!

Those are great! Thanks for sharing.
Anonymous said…
ROFLMAO!!! These are all a riot and most of them are true LOL Thanks for sharing this. :) Have a great day :)
Mia Celeste said…
Ha! I like number 4 about the handle on life being broken. Thanks.
colleen said…
I like the first one best.
jillconyers said…
A great laugh to start my day. Thanks!
colleen said…
Hi Hazel, What's a 'takuri?' (from a comment you left on my blog? http://looseleafnotes.com
Divaa Divine said…
NO.1 is actually my reason for divorce :)

as hilarious it is - it falls right for me :)

http://2short2sweet.blogspot.com/2010/08/what-you-could-not-ask.html

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