T13: Women as explained by engineers

Header by Samulli. Play T13 here.

Here's another EnjoyTheMasti mail which I don't consider spam while the fun it brings lasts. The claim is nobody understands women better than engineers do. Their definition is composed of five parts consisting significant points about women, all numbered 1 to 13 which make up my list today.

I. HAZARDOUS MATERIAL DATA SHEET

1. Element: Woman, Symbol: O+, Discoverer: Adam

2. Atomic Mass: Accepted as 55 kg. but known to vary from 45 kg. to 225 kg.

II. PHYSICAL PROPERTIES

3. Body surface normally covered with film of powder and paint

4. Boils at absolutely nothing - freezes for no apparent reason

5. Found in various grades ranging from virgin material to common ore.

III. CHEMICAL PROPERTIES

6. Reacts well to gold, platinum and all precious stones

7. Explodes spontaneously without reason or warning

8. The most powerful money-reducing agent known to man.

IV. COMMON USE

9. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars

10. Can greatly aid relaxation

11. Can be a very effective cleaning agent

V. HAZARDS

12. Turns green when placed alongside a superior specimen

13. Possession of more than one is possible but specimens must never make eye contact